There’s a hole
right in my chest
where emotion stood
A little house, on a
wide frozen sea
If I was as good a
friend as you said, if
I really meant that much to you
then why didn’t you say?
Why did I have to dig and
dig, knowing something was
wrong to find out it was
all wrong and
to drag out an explanation
I knew you couldn’t love me,
because love scares you
and I’m a fucking freak
I knew that would always be true
(have you seen him,
drawn, pale, shaped
like living death?)
You can’t return those
feelings, though I never
wanted those feelings
back
You didn’t want a
relationship; yet you never
asked what I wanted
You never asked if
we could just be friends
This drawing, clawing
anger
like some
slow
kind
of
madness
pulling me
down
and down
and down
(so
far
d
o
w
n)
I want to burn in this madness
I want to shine like the morning star
I want to scream
I want to hate you
and remove you
piece by piece,
so that it all
never happened
I want to burn it down
and forget your face
But I can’t
I can’t
I don’t think I could
live with that choice
But I can’t stand it
understand
recreate
They say time heals
all wounds
but it makes the
loneliness show
instead
I guess I really fucked up this time